Josh Rosen is getting another chance. Kind of. The former Arizona Cardinal and UCLA Bruin got a promotion this week to starting quarterback of the Miami Dolphins.
Josh Rosen should say no.
Rosen, who is already known to maybe be a bit too smart for his own good, should use that superior intellect to think about what there is to gain playing for the Dolphins on Sunday against the Dallas Cowboys. The Dolphins are bad. Historically bad. Rosen has seen this movie before last season in Arizona where he was thrust behind another terrible offensive line and another terrible chance at success. It forever changed the way we looked at the kid, and it wasn’t his fault. He played behind an offensive line that included a rookie center, Andre Smith and Justin Pugh. In 2019. It was unbelievable that Rosen’s shoulder remained in-tact to fight another day after the season concluded.
He has seen this movie before.
If you’re Rosen, you’re already pissed at the fact that Ryan Fitzpatrick was named QB1 after the team traded multiple picks for you on the day of the NFL Draft. To trade for Rosen only to not start him in Week 1 was insane. You don’t play Fitzmagic unless you have to play Fitzmagic. It’s like going to Applebees -- you always know what you’re getting and you only go when you have no other options. (No disrespect to Applebees, I’m just a Chilis Guy myself. Speaking of, I need to hurry up and finish this piece and grab a Cajun Chicken Pasta before they close. Back to Rosen.) If I were Rosen, I’d have checked out right after I wasn’t named the starter Week 1. Fitzpatrick in a rebuilding year? What? Who does this?
Brian Flores and the Dolphins did that and now they face the Cowboys. You could make the case that the ‘Phins are facing the two best teams in the NFL in back-to-back weeks. Which, if you’re Chris Grier, general manager of the Dolphins, is great because it’s another game you don’t have to worry about winning. Tank For Tua is alive and well and poor Rosen is being thrown to the wolves once again. Would you like to guess who Pro Football Focus had as the worst offensive line in football before Laremy Tunsil was traded away? You guessed it -- the Dolphins. That said, the Cowboys’ defense hasn’t been great sitting at 20th against the pass and 22nd against the run through two weeks, per Football Outsiders. It’s the little things if you’re Rosen, right?
The problem? The Dolphins are going to play from behind. A lot. When you’re behind, you throw more. When you throw more and your offensive line is as bad as that “Dexter” series finale, you get hit a lot. If you’re Rosen, you are already went through that all last season and it got you traded and changed the way teams looked at you. It felt like a David Carr-like existence was unavoidable. Now, you’re experiencing deja vu in Miami, and who would blame you for telling Coach Play Jay-Z 9,0000 Times In A Row Flores that you’re, ugh, going to sit this one out. You know you’re set-up to fail. If you fail here, that’s it. You’re suddenly Chad Henne and never looked at as a franchise guy again. Perception matters and one 15-37 game for 137 yards and two picks in a 42-7 loss is bad for perception.
Rosen, just say that magic, beautiful word: “No.” We’re all with you.
On to what I’m interested in for Week 3 in the NFL.
Bengals OVER Bills (38-24)
OK. I’m a believer in the Bengals. Don’t freak out, have you seen Tyler Boyd lately? Are you checking on those skill-position guys in AJ Green, Joe Mixon, John Ross, Tyler Eifert, and Boyd for Andy Dalton to not fully utilize, well, ever? This offense is spicy, and, had Jonah Williams not been lost for the season are we looking at this team differently? This offense has all the ingredients to be a pain-in-the-ass in 11-personnel sets? Sure, the Bengals are going 5-11 this season, but the Bills’ offense isn’t outscoring Cincy tomorrow. 3-0 Buffalo? In this economy?
Cowboys OVER Dolphins (42-10)
What the hell, Miami? I don’t even like thinking about you at this point and it’s Week 3. You trade Tunsil, Minkah, and are looking to trade whoever else you can to ensure can nab Alabama’s QB next April. You are literal “bye” week for everyone and that sucks. It’s bad for the NFL and it’s bad for my Saturday night NFL column because who wants to read me bitch about the Dolphins every week but how can you not? What they’re doing is trash ethically, gross aesthetically and, man, I hope Dallas beats them by 90.
Broncos OVER Green Bay (31-28)
What? Denver? The team that lost to Oakland and Chicago? Yes, sir. Why? Starting 0-3 in the NFL is essentially a death sentence. You start 0-3 the odds are heavily stacked against you making the playoffs and the Broncos are making the playoffs, damn it. Vic Fangio has to get better, right? The Kyle Shanahan disciple running the offense has to figure it out with this group, right? Fangio’s defense is sitting at 24th in Defensive DVOA through two weeks and, well, how? Sorry. I don’t love this Green Bay team right now and the Broncos are desperate. Give me Flacco, baby.
Falcons OVER Colts (28-21)
I don’t like this. Indy’s secondary with Malik Hooker and friends is legit and I’m suddenly concerned with Matt Ryan’s decision-making ability after a decade-plus of not being concerned with his decision-making. The Falcons’ offense came alive on Sunday Night Football, though, and with the injury issues in the NFC South’s two best teams, the Falcons have to take advantage. Scoring more than Jacoby Brissett is part of the deal.
(Sidebar: Would you like to guess what Devonta Freeman’s yard per carry number is this season? Would you guess 3.2? I would. I’m not looking it up, though, because it’s late and I’m tired.
Chiefs OVER Ravens (42-35)
Yes! Week 3 and we’re getting Lamar Jackson vs. Patrick Mahomes? You love to see it, folks. The Ravens’ secondary against Mahomes without Tyreek Hill? Yes, please. Jackson getting another fun-filled week against a bad defense? Yes, please. It’s incredible how little I have to think about picking a Mahomes-led team now? Is he playing the Patriots? No? Give me the Chiefs. They’re going 13-3 every season and I will enjoy every second of it.
Vikings OVER Raiders (31-10)
The Raiders were fun for a week. Watching Josh Jacobs run all over Denver in Week 1 was fun. Seeing fans in Oakland happy before their team leaves for Vegas was, well, nice. Watching Kirk Cousins play a team without a pass rush is nice, too. When Cousins has time, he finds Stefon Diggs and Adam Thielen often. He should have time and the Vikings should win big. If Kirk Cousins played behind the Cowboys’ offensive line every year would he ever miss a Pro Bowl? I can’t rule it out.
Patriots OVER Jets (35-7)
How is Colin Kaepernick not a New York Jet yet? Who is starting for them this week? The San Jose State kid? Chris Simms? Not Kaepernick? How? Does he not fit Adam Gase’s scheme? Does David freaking Fales? The Jets were a wildcard team before the season and now they might beat out the Dolphins for Tua. Do we see Tom Brady in the second half tomorrow? No, right?
Eagles OVER Lions (34-17)
I hate this Detroit team. They’re not bad. They’re probably OK. They could 11-5 and it would not surprise me. The offensive line is sorted out, they have a competent running back for the first time in forever, you like their receivers and the secondary and defensive line has talent. I just don’t like Matt Patricia and Darrell Bevell. How could you? Who is all-in in those guys? Everything is Not Sunny In Philadelphia right now, but Carson Wentz is not losing to Atlanta and Detroit on the road in back-to-back weeks.
Cardinals OVER Panthers (24-6)
I am not the president of the Kyle Allen Is Good club. It’s concerning that Will Grier is just, like, not even in the discussion, right? They used a third-round pick on a guy who was in college for 34 years and he was so bad in the preseason it feels like he is two years away from being two years away. Did I mention Ron River is the first-coach fired this season, yet? No? Well, losing to the Cardinals at home will do that. Kyler Fever, catch it!
Bucs OVER Giants (38-17)
Daniel Jones! He’s not Eli Manning in 2019, so he should be better, right? He can’t not be better than Eli, right? Right? The problem? The Giants secondary sucks and they don’t have a pass rush. This has all the makings of a big Jameis game where he throws for 300 yards, a couple TDs and we’re all back on the Winston Experience in Tampa. Do you have Chris Godwin in fantasy? Congrats! You’re winning this week.
Chargers OVER Texans (20-17)
I don’t feel great about this. Like Mahomes, I don’t like betting against Deshaun Watson. It feels gross. Outside of Tom Brady, my Give Me This Guy If I Need To Win Just One Game dude is Watson. He could have a bad offensive line forever and this guy will go 10-6 and make the playoffs. It’s what he does. I’m out on the Chargers as a playoff team this year, but I like them at home here. I don’t know why, but 2-1 feels right for LAC.
Seahawks OVER Saints (24-21)
Damn it. We really get this game the week RIGHT after Drew Brees goes down? I hate it. The Saints in Seattle is always fun. The Seahawks play like Alabama now, right? They’re physical, have an elite quarterback they only use when they have to and a defense that will never not be in the elite category. It’s wild and it works. Poor Teddy Bridgewater who has to travel to Seattle out of the gate. Still, I think Teddy does some stuff here and the conservative Seahawks keep the Saints in this game.
49ers OVER Steelers (35-28)
Rest In Peace, 2019 Steelers. It was over before it began. The Niners are 2-0 and Jimmy G isn’t playing well. Matt Breida is an elite back in Shanny’s scheme and the Niners’ defense is forcing turnovers now with a new, exciting pass rush. Mason Rudolph isn’t going to have time and Pittsburgh won’t be able to outscore Shanny in San Fran. Breida by 1,000.
Browns OVER Rams (38-31)
Oh yeah, baby. The Browns at home on primetime against an undefeated contender in the NFC? This has all the makings of a statement game for Cleveland. 1-2 and it feels like the Ravens are running away from the AFC North. A win against Sean McVay’s crew on primetime and it feels like they’ve arrived. Beating the Jets is cool. Getting beaten by the Titans is less cool. Taking care of the Rams on primetime is well, dope. It's now or never, Preseason Champs.
Redskins OVER Bears (31-17)
Why do people think Jay Gruden is getting fired? Dwayne Haskins hasn’t played a down yet. Trent Williams is just gone. Terry McLaurin looks like a star. Jim Haslett put out a terrible defense in DC for years and never got canned. The Redskins are not trigger-happy with this sort of thing and you don’t just fire an Arena Football legend without seeing how his first-round QB looks in his offense. Did I mention Case Keenum is better than Mitch Trubisky? If we gave truth serum to Matt Nagy would he say he’d rather have Keenum this week? I’d bet yes. If Trubisky doesn’t throw a TD against this secondary when is Rosen a Bear? Week 7? Asking for a friend.
Chase Thomas is an independent sports writer based out of Atlanta, Georgia. You can follow him on Twitter at @Chase__Thomas. You can email him at email@example.com.